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Patron Comments | Participant come-backs |
What's under your Kilt? | "Ultimate dumb patron come-back story" |
-Boots.
-Nothing is worn, it's all in fine working order!
If you're lucky, just a wee bit o' lipstick...
-I'm a man of few words -give me your hand...
My friends and I are in college and enjoy attending rennaisance fairs, usually in some form of dress. The night before one fair my boyfriend was walking around campus in a kilt that I had just completed for him. Several of our fellow students inisted on asking why he was wearing a skirt/kilt. After hearing that one to many times he smiled, produced a very good Scottish brogue and said "I'm doing a survey to see how many people ask if I am wearing anything under it or not. The people that ask, I show. Care to participate?" The response was priceless. Just for the record he was NOT going regimental.
PA
I work at a tuxedo shop that rents kilts. I was renting out a kilt for a highschool kid for prom. While I'm finishing up with him a gentalman comes into the shop wearing a formal kilt. Apparently he needs a bow tie in a hurry. While I'm helping the gentleman the kid asks "What do you wear under that?"
The gentleman responded, "Socks and shoes."
The kid's eyes lit up but before he even said anything his mom said, "Don't even think it."
Conner O'Dea, MN
I have been asked this question many times during my ten years of reenacting. I have come up with several responses:
-- "Lad/ lassie, if you don't know by now, what's the use of me telling you?"
-- "Feet. What's under your pants?"
-- (While I'm walking) "At the moment, grass. Soon there will be pavement."
-- "All the nasty stories you can only read about."
-- "My back-up claymore."
-- "A few English peasant girls. You can't see them, but they're there."
-- "A katana. Didn't you see "Highlander?"
I have to remember to try to keep my responses period, but after a while I just get fed up and let them fly.
An Occasional Scot, CA
And something to say when you know they want a serious answer... Traditionally, the kilt was worn with a shirt that was long enough to keep you "decent" if you took off the kilt. This shirt, (or a shift/chemise for women) was often the only "undergarment" that the lowest classes commonly wore.
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